Proof That The World Is Nuts

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals,
but the animals must be female.
Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.)

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In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals, but is
prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may
only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)

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Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse.
This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be
covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick??)

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The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than “going blind!”)

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There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time
Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let’s just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the
world that even comes close to this?)

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In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous
husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband’s illicit
lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)

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Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)

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In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the
first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the
act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

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In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman
and her daughter at the same time

( I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

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In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only “in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the
premises.”

(Is this a great country or what? Well . . . not as great as Guam!)

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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?!)
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Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)

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The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of …. ?)

(Did the government pay for this research??)

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Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Ah, geez.)

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An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

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Starfish don’t have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)

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And, the best for last:

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

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35 thoughts on “Proof That The World Is Nuts”

  1. In Maryland, it is ill egal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only “in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the
    premises.”

    (Is this a great country or what? Well . . . not as great as Guam!)

    A great country?? Maryland is a state!

    Real funny, aside the little MD confusion lol

  2. Pigs definitely have sex for pleasure, and dogs sure as hell do. Come on now. Evolution has made sex pleasurable so we’ll do it, duh. Any species currently thriving has sex for pleasure. Who’s to say when the animals meant to procreate or not? That’s just me, though.

  3. I find your post extremely insulting to my country, Lebanon. In no place in Lebanon is it acceptable to have intercourse with an animal, male or female, and furthermore, more than being a crime, it is frowned upon, which is more than you can say about public opinion of such lewd acts in the United States.

  4. The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

    This is not true. I’m Indonesian and I’ve been jerking off since I was 10. :mrgreen:

  5. Guam is US territory & completely modern you geniuses…. 🙄
    I’ve been there…it’s like a slightly less commercial Hawaii.

  6. About the supposed Guam costume, I found this on http://www.fijiwomen.com:

    Marie Claire Insults Guam

    The women of Guam have denounced an article in the international women’s fashion magazine, Marie Claire, which stated that Guam women may not marry as virgins and that a man travels the island “deflowering” future brides. The article appeared in the December issue of the magazine and was under the caption title: “Jobs your boyfriend wants”.

    Lt. Gov. Madeleine Bordallo described the article as disgusting. “It was written in ignorance and I think we have to do something about it,” she said.

    The Colonised Chamoru Coalition called on Guamanian organizations nationwide to join in protest and boycott the magazine. It has also asked business houses to cease carrying the magazine in their shelves.

    Coalition members are seeking legal assistance to determine what action can be taken against Marie Claire.

    – Daily Post (23/12/2001)

  7. I’m living in Guam and let me tell ya, there ain’t no such job. I’d have applied lol. Plus, there are to many Navy and Air Force guys doing it for free!

  8. what a load of drivel the scary thing some of the more stupid people out there will actually believe this stuff hong kong indeed bollocks

  9. Pigs definitely have sex for pleasure, and dogs sure as hell do

    I dont know about dogs, but pigs have 30 minute orgasms, Ive heard. As for all the things about other countries, please try to keep an open mind that, perhaps while legal, there aren’t too many people desiring to have sex with animals. Posts like this can be highly offensive, especially with all the referred users from stumbleupon (thats how I found it). There are many outdated laws in the US that are equally as absurd.

  10. If my dog is only having sex for the purposes of reproduction, than what can he be hoping to achieve by humping the sofa cushion? My God, I have just realized that my dog must be attempting to create some unholy hybrid of the canine/seating species! This would actually be pretty excellent, as I could sit comfortably upon its cushiony back as I took it for a walk. My dog may be mad, but he’s a mad genius!

  11. Notice it does not say that all other animals only have sex for reproduction purposes….they don’t have sex ONLY for pleasure. They can still get pleasure from it without that being the sole purpose.
    Only humans & dolphins will have sex ONLY for pleasure, even if they do not want offspring or cannot reproduce. If you fix a dog or cat, they lose the desire. It’s an instinct to reproduce that makes them want sex, even if it is still pleasurable.
    You learn in HS science….

  12. Notice it does not say that all other animals only have sex for reproduction purposes….they don’t have sex ONLY for pleasure. They can still get pleasure from it without that being the sole purpose.
    Only humans & dolphins will have sex ONLY for pleasure, even if they do not want offspring or cannot reproduce. If you fix a dog or cat, they lose the desire. It’s an instinct to reproduce that makes them want sex, even if it is still pleasurable.
    You learn in HS science….

    If you “fix” (castrate) a human male, he will also lose sexual desire. If a human male is infertile, he will not. Are you suggesting that a dog somehow knows that he is no longer capable of reproduction after castration, and that is why the desire for sex stops? He has been physically and biologically changed, and that is why the desire for sex is gone. If a cat, through some biological defect, is infertile but otherwise normal, do you think the cat will not have a sex drive because it somehow knows that sex will be fruitless?

    And it is primitive sexual instinct that drives all animals to reproduce. Humans, dolphins, rats, bears…..they all engage in sexual activity because it feels good. That, coupled with primal instinct, is the only thing that drives higher life forms to reproduce.

  13. Bonobos have sex for every reason we do, not just to procreate (with an added measure of pleasure)

    They also have sex for other reasons, if the tribe is upset, they have an orgy – Calms them all down

    They have also been thought sign, and they can mix signs to create new sentiences but thats another topic !

  14. Im a Guamanian as well~ Truth be told I was wondering about this 100% FALSE accusation for quite some time. I remember everyone being upset over it, but I never really got the full explanation of who said what and the final outcome of it.

    I was a trouble free middle schooler at the time- mind you~<3

  15. The one about lebenon and bahrain isnt true and the muslims cover the midsection of the deceased with a cloth not a brick or piece of wood

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