A Slight Booger Problem

Booger ProblemDon’t you hate it when you are driving 80 mph and your nose kind of itches, so you pick at it, not PICK IT, but just kind pick at the edge of your nostril with your thumb without even thinking about what you are doing, and you get a little bit of old, dried booger, like just a LITTLE flake of booger, and you begin to remove the little, tiny, booger-flake but then you feel a sensation like the entire contents of your head are connected to this booger flake, and its too late to stop pulling the booger out, and a huge, I MEAN HUGE booger slides out of your nasal cavity and your eyes kind of sink back into your head from the pressure change, but then all the air that rushes in to fill the void left by the mega-booger pushes them back into their sockets, and then you have this banana-slug of a booger draped over your thumb and back of your hand and down your wrist, but you are driving fucking 80mph and you are wearing a suit and don’t have a tissue so you don’t know what to do with this sudden appearance of the King of All Boogers on your hand, so you roll down the window and hope that the wind will blow it off you, but the booger doesn’t cooperate and ends up embedded in the sleeve of your suit jacket?

Fuck. I hate that.