Property Lines And Assholes

As I perused one of my daily haunts, pointless-drivel.com, home of the fabulous Mr. Fab who recently moved several hundred miles closer to me, Kentucky to be exact, was amazed at the audacity of his neighbor who came barging out of his house only to go into a tirade because Mr. Fab mowed a tiny bit over onto his property. I agree with Mr. Fab and his way of thinking that most people wouldn’t mind their neighbor mowing a little extra grass. I know I don’t mind, that’s less that I have to mow.

Welcome to Dixie Land USA!

The place where a property line can turn even the best neighbor into a bickering idiotic fool.

And I must say, unfortunately, that some of my neighbors are the worst around. They all get along until someone crosses the line, literally.

Allow me to gossip about my neighbors for a while.

One neighbor (neighbor “A”) had some huge pine trees in his yard. Not only were they tall, they were very round also. The trees were never trimmed, and the limbs had overgrown the property boundaries. My other neighbor (neighbor “B”) screamed, cussed, and stomped every time he tried to mow his yard because the pine tree limbs were in his way. There were several fights over these trees until neighbor “A” decided he would just hire someone to cut the trees down and clean up the mess.

Neighbor “B” thought this was a great idea. No more ugly ass pine trees. No more pine needles in the pool. No more sap dripping on his head as he mowed. He was happy alright, until the tree cutters showed up along with their heavy equipment.

Neigbor “B” quickly parked his vehicles at the edge of his property line and put his lawn chair in his pickup truck so he could kick back and “watch” the tree cutters.

He dared them to even get a limb on his property. And God forbid any sawdust should blow on his vehicles. The windows are down for Pete’s sake! Do you know how hard it is to vacuum out sawdust?! And the sap, Oh My God! the sap. It will eat the paint off my vehicles!

The tree trimmers packed up their stuff and left just as quickly as they arrived.

Neighbor “B” continues to cuss (although not quite as loud) every time he has to mow around the limbs that are now sticking across his property line even farther.

Neighbor “A” thinks it is funny.

I think it is funny.

Neighbor “B” is an asshole.

With neighbors like this, it isn’t any wonder that health insurance and property insurance is so high.

9 thoughts on “Property Lines And Assholes”

  1. That is so strange! If somebody mowed a bit of my lawn I’d love it. In fact they could mow the whole thing if they wanted!

    And you’re right. Neighbour B is an asshole! 🙂 With any luck he’ll get sappy sawdust in his ignition!

    LJPs last blog post..Mr Flibble Is Very Cross

  2. Mr Fab – Your neighbor could turn out to be just as bad, or worse. You better take care of it right away. Barney Fife said it best when he said, “Nip it in the bud! You got to nip it in the bud! … Nip it! You go read any book you want on the subject of bad neighbors, and you’ll find that every one of ’em is in favor of bud-nippin’… Only one way to take care of it.”

    LJP – I agree. My neighbor can mow my entire lawn. I wouldn’t mind a bit.

    Tom – Especially if they are old.

  3. Ah haha! That’s hilarious. If somebody mowed a bit of my lawn I’d love it. In fact they could mow the whole thing if they wanted!

  4. I am a guy picky about my lawn. I leave it long in the summer.my niebor asked me to change his brakes on his car and i refused. that weekend he mowed a 360 in my front yard.(down to the brown)I put tomato stakes up. so he did it again, so I put up more. he mowed rainbows stake to stake. So i put stakes every four feet down the property should i be mad. he comes on my property and peeps in my windows( should i just tell this guy off and ruine that friendly niegbor attitude bull. I even had the property serveyed and showed him the pins. because he was cutting 2ft on my property and told me not to cut his lawn.

  5. @ Paul – You have a right to be mad, and confront him. The reason being that you had the place surveyed and staked it out just for the sole purpose of keeping him off of it.

    The stakes should have been all it took to tell him to stay off.

  6. Neighbor “B” is getting what he deserves. LOL!!! It IS funny!

    …Just happened by here ~ searching for something about property from the days when old-timers planted trees AS the property line ~ and figured might as well throw in my 2 cents worth!

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